The potential of freedom from any addiction ― our power to transcend our unhealthy cravings and urges ― lies directly in the moment it arises. The question is, will you pause and take the opportunity when it surfaces to transmute it? Or will you succumb to the impulse and choose instant gratification instead?
I learned a long time ago that love does not live at the bottom of a cookie jar, or in this case, a bag of chips.
A few weeks ago, out of nowhere, I had an experience of a sudden very intense potato chip craving emerge. Being that this is not something I usually crave, I found it especially fascinating at how fixated on them I became.
With each passing second I could feel my mouth watering and my desire for these salty morsels increase. And even though this didn’t fit the mold of a “normal” craving for me (e.g. sweets – especially anything chocolate and gooey – and/or kale chips which are more my style these days), it was a gripping feeling nonetheless, one that took hold of my entire body, awakening my salivary glands at the mere thought of the potential savory salty goodness on my tongue.
As I lay in bed fantasizing, and now drooling, about the bag of salt and vinegar Kettle chips in the kitchen – which were totally minding their own business in the pantry (and were not even mine to eat) – rather than succumb to the sudden desire to rip open and ravish the entire bag in one sitting, I decided to explore what was going on at a deeper level.
What I noticed immediately was desire.
And although somehow my brain had latched onto the idea of the chips being the object of my desire (with my body now screaming for them as well) they were not what I was truly craving. The chips were simply a distraction (and a possible sign that my body needed some sodium and electrolytes) to keep me from feeling lonely.
The craving was a beautiful reminder for me to come back to myself, to focus my loving attention inward, to connect with the Divine light of the Universe and to love the part of myself that felt lonely and desired something outside of me to satisfy this need ― and sense of emptiness ― that no chip would, or could, ever fill.
In the past, I would have surrendered to the chips, and then felt a horrible backlash around my lack of will power (aka: failure).
This time I chose differently.
I surrendered to the will of the Universe and called in the light of the Divine. I claimed and cleared my space energetically, commanding that any foreign energy that was not mine leave my space immediately. I told the part of me that felt lonely “It’s okay honey, I’m here with you now and I’m not going anywhere. You are loved and supported and you are never alone. I’m so sorry you’ve felt this way. Thank you so much for telling me. I love you”.
I did a version of this process for 3 nights in a row (each time the chip craving surfaced) after which I felt completely at peace and totally over the seduction of the salty vinegar chips, and the illusion of happiness I had projected onto them.
I never did eat a single Kettle chip.
And in this pause, I transcended the need to keep playing out the unconscious dance of addiction, that for so long led me away from truly knowing and loving myself in the moments I require it the most.
I also discovered and acknowledged a very sweet and human inner child part of me, one who now knows I am not going to abandon her to greasy fried distractions, instead of giving her the love and attention and validation, she is truly asking for, and is completely deserving of.
In connecting with myself I came to discover the true message within the craving and the doorway to freedom it held.
Underneath the call of a craving, you will find the true desire (what you are really longing for) along with the opportunity to transcend the false promise of relief, that the object of your craving pretends to hold. Our relationship with food is a direct reflection of our relationship with our inner self.
We can learn so much about our emotional patterns when we pause and notice what arises in us, BEFORE indulging in whatever tempting treat is whispering our name. Because when we eat our emotions, instead of feeling them and acknowledging them fully, we actually serve to feed and enhance the toxic emotional patterns that are the underlying source ― the driving force ― beneath our surface level cravings.
By choosing instead to move your loving attention inward, and attuning to what you really need (on a soul level), you will no longer have to look outside of yourself, to soothe and fill the holes and aches in your heart.
How do we transcend our addictions and heal our destructive cravings?
We pause; we breathe; we slow down; we take our power back. We allow space for the gift our craving holds to emerge ― there is always an opportunity for growth hidden within our emotional patterns and addictive pulls.
Then we sit for a moment, with the uncomfortable feelings that surface ― the one’s whose mere whisper is often enough to send us running, at lightning speed, in pursuit of the closest processed food morsel to shovel down our throat, in a desperate attempt to distract and silence and suppress our undesirable emotions from staging a rogue up-rising of expression ― an outright mutiny ― as they prepare to explosively blast themselves all over the place.
We allow ourselves to simply be with them, feel them, and notice what arises within us.
If we want to judge what shows up, we notice that too. And we comfort these parts as we would a devastated child, with love and kindness and compassion.
As we do this, and connect within to our heart, we can choose to call in the divine light of the Universe ― which is always right there ready and available to help us ― and ask for support in connecting to the light and in finding the message and the gift that our craving holds. Shining the light frequency of love on these dark shadows, illuminates and alchemizes the root of our patterns, the ones that manifest on the surface as the very cravings to whom we feel completely helpless, and powerless to move beyond.
This is how we re-claim our empowerment and move from a space of reaction, into a space of response, how we consciously shift from being at ‘effect’ (a helpless victim of circumstance) to being at ‘cause’ (a responsible co-creator of our reality)― remembering that we are divine spiritual beings having an embodied human experience, not the other way around.
Claiming my worth, loving the parts of me that hurt, healing painful toxic emotions and clearing out negative energy from my space, consistently, has made a huge difference in the quality of my life.
May you be blessed with love and kindness toward yourself always, especially in your most challenging moments. And remember, you are completely worthy and deserving of authentic real love, which will never be found in a greasy potato chip or sugary processed snack food.
This is all part of what I call, The Alchemy of Awakening.
– Diana Rose Kottle
About the Author: Diana Rose KOTTLE, MA, MFT is one of Your Monthly Mentors, a Consciousness Architect + Soul Alchemist + Soul Alignment Guide. She helps people align with their soul’s true purpose, so they can live their highest vision and impact the world. Diana’s approach bridges psychology + spirituality + consciousness + technology. Her professional training and education includes a BA in Psychology, an MA in Counseling Psychology, and a license in Marriage and Family Therapy. She is currently writing several new books including: ‘Soul Alchemy’ and ‘The Alchemy of Awakening’. Read More…