Developing mental strength is one of the key elements in leading a happy and successful life. Mental strength is a skill that can be learned by anyone. The definition of mental strength varies from one person to another. However, common factors such as focus in the midst of challenges and creating big visions for their life and following through with them.
Regardless of the definition of mental strength, there are various characteristics common to people with mental strength. They have a number of things they do and some that they do not do. If you are striving to become mentally strong, here is a list of things you should not be doing.
1. They do not spend time feeling sorry for themselves
Mentally strong people understand that they cannot control everything that happens around them. They do not spend time wallowing about missed opportunities or the unfairness surrounding them. Instead, they focus on shaping the course of their lives regardless of the circumstances that surround them.
Instead of focusing on all the wrong things that are happening in your life, practice being grateful for what you have. Gratitude helps you suddenly change your attitude from negative to positive. Soon, circumstances you saw as impossible become opportunities for growth.
2. They are not afraid of change
Life is full of changes. The mentally strong person is aware of this and does not allow himself to dwell in a comfort zone. They are constantly looking for ways to make themselves even better. When change comes, they see opportunity and embrace it. Mentally strong people have faith in their ability to adapt to changes.
To eliminate the fear of change, it is important to remind yourself that growth comes from change.
3. They do not give away their power
Mentally strong people are aware that they are in charge of their lives. They understand that they are in charge of their thoughts and their emotions and they control them. Mentally strong people do not give up control to people or things. They have learned to maintain a balance between their thoughts and their emotions.
To become mentally strong, it is important to set personal and emotional boundaries. In order to set these boundaries, you have to understand your self-worth, your limitations and your definition of success. This way, you are better equipped to handle your actions and emotions.
4. They do not strive to please everyone
Mentally strong people appreciate the fact that they cannot please all people. In fact, they do not try to please people or win their love. They know that they will ruffle a few feathers along the way. Mentally weak people tend to say yes to every favor asked of them. The mark of a mentally strong person is the courage to say no’ even when they are expected to say yes’.
Learn every day to say no to requests you feel you cannot handle. Do not over commit yourself to events or activities you cannot handle. Politely decline activities you feel will put a strain on your schedule.
5. They do not fear taking risks
Mentally strong people are not afraid of taking risks. They understand that success comes from trying. When faced with a situation that is risky, they calculate their risks and approach the situation from a point of knowledge.
Taking risks frightens the average person because they are afraid of leaving their comfort zones. However, to be mentally strong, you have to learn to appreciate fear. You appreciate the fear of taking risks by carefully analyzing the advantages and disadvantages of taking the risk and weighing them than developing a sound strategy. This way, you are taking informed risks not walking blindly into situations.
6. They do not live in the past
Mentally strong people are aware that they cannot change the past. They do not blame themselves for what happened. Neither do they waste their time thinking about what could have been? They accept the past as it is and move on. They learn from the mistakes of the past and avoid similar mistakes in the future.
To develop mental strength, teach yourself to take responsibility for your own mistakes. Owning up to your mistakes allows you to work on your weakness and correct your mistakes. Taking responsibility for your actions become a great source of mental strength since you understand only, you are responsible for what you do or do not do.
7. They are not jealous of other people’s success
Mentally strong individuals understand that the world does not owe them anything and that other people have the same opportunities to be successful. They are therefore not resentful of people who are doing better than them. In fact, successful people strive to build others up. The reason mentally strong people do not feel jealous over other people’s achievements is that they never compare themselves to others. They do not sit around waiting upon the opinions of others.
To be mentally strong, take time each day to appreciate someone’s achievements. Respect them and make them your close friends. That way, you will learn from them. Another way to improve your mental strength is to mentor someone either directly or indirectly so that they can succeed.
8. They do not quit after failure
Mentally strong people are aware that failure is part of success. They do not quit after failing no matter how many times they fail. One example of a mentally strong person is Thomas Edison who failed 10,000 times before finally succeeding in making the light bulb. Instead of quitting when they fail, they use their failures as lessons to becoming even better.
The average person quits after the first failure because they allow the inner critic to over their minds. To develop mental strength, it is important to learn to silence the inner critic. Instead, look at your failures objectively, see where you went wrong and try. Do not let negative thoughts or feelings of inferiority stand between you and your mental strength.
9. They do not seek instant gratification
Mentally strong people have learned the art of patience. They are aware that nothing worth having comes easily. They work hard with skill and diligence waiting patiently for the results to come.
Instant gratification often comes at the cost of success. To become mentally strong (and successful), teach yourself to delay gratification for a little longer. Put effort and persistence towards your goals or activities to which you commit yourself.
Now that you know the 9 things mentally strong people do not do, you have a place to start in your journey to becoming mentally strong.
About the Author: Steven AITCHISON is one of Your Monthly Mentors, UK’s #1 Personal Development blogger. With a Facebook following of over 3.7 million and growing, Steven’s mission is to help millions of people around the world better themselves in any way that they can. Steven’s blog is entitled “Change Your Thoughts – Change Your Life.” He currently resides in South Lanarkshire, Scotland and hosts live shows on Facebook every weekday at 2pm BST. Read More…